That Gormandizer Man

A night at the Social Club

There's a chapter in the excellent Kitchen Confidential where Mr. Bourdain explains the ins and outs of an average day at work in the kitchens of Les Halles.

So, being an unashamed plagiarist, I thought I'd do exactly the same thing. What subject could I possibly write about in detail that could be interesting and insightful? Well, I thought a night in a Social Club in the North East may be useful to some of you.

Working class people, what they think about advertising and the things that interest them.

The following is all real...

--

    I get out of the taxi and give the racist taxi driver the £2.80 it costs from the station. According to him he's "not racist, but" those foreigners are making his job harder. I try and give my side of the story, but it sounds like a politician shouting at a guest on Jeremy Kyle so I shut up and bite my lip.
    Outside the club there are a few people smoking. They're called 'tabs' up here and they're very popular. Forget your Marlboro Lights, it's all about the Benson & Hedges and the Lambert & Butler up here. I overhear them slurring through a conversation about the football earlier that day. Predictably, their team has been beaten (regardless whether it's Hartlepool ('Pools'), Newcastle ('Tha Toon'), Sunderland ('mackems') or Middlesgrough ('The Boro')), but they're blaming the referee and the foreign players of their own team.
    I go in, scribble a completely illegible name in the visitors book, and disguise the fact that I only drop about 8p into the contributions box.

    I walk straight upstairs. Upstairs is where the action is on a weekend. It's where the 'turn' will be on. Downstairs I can see blokes playing snooker and dominoes, laughing and moaning in equal measure at each other. At the top of the stairs the same bloke sits in the same seat giving out the tickets to the turn. It's always a piece of card with a stamp on it, and you pick one of those up if you go back downstairs after the turn have started. It's so you can get back in.
    Getting in the function room costs £2. Sometimes it even goes up to £4. That'll get you two 'spots' of about 45 minutes each, although if there are people up dancing at 11pm they'll keep going on a little bit longer. And there are always people dancing, because they've been on the Carling for 4 hours by then.
I walk into the function room. It's a bit musty, it's buzzing with chatter and it feels too big without the plume of tab smoke that used to grace it every weekend before smoking was banned inside.
    It's 100% white working class. There is no-one here from a different racial background, and no-one I recognise as anything other than blue collar, working class people. A tattoo audit would be interesting - you can tell the age of people by their tattoos. A swallow means they're in their 50s, a celtic band means they're in their 20s and dots on the knuckles means they've probably just got out from a ten-stretch.

I look over at the same spot my dad has sat at since I can remember and he's there waving at me. I walk over.
"Now then son. I've saved you a seat."
"Thanks dad. It's busy tonight isn't it?"
"Aye. Good turn tonight son. That's why I got in early. How was the match?"
"Shite. We were crap, the fans were crap and the referee was crap. Everyone's blaming [foreign player], but they were all crap, dad. We could have played for 90 days and not scored. Anyway... do you want a pint?"
"No thanks son, I'll get the drinks for me and Linda. We're in our own round."
"I don't mind getting you a pint just to say hello dad..."
"No thanks son."
I walk to the bar. The bar in the social club is interesting. They have some football terracing next to the bar, and there's a queuing system. No pushing happens and everyone waits their turn patiently. These are people that savour their drink, and they may be hard people, people who have grafted, but on the whole they're very well mannered. Especially when it comes to queuing for drink. I get the the bar and I ask for a pint of Ruby Red. That's the local ale. A pint is poured via a button. There's no pumps here, just buttons. It stops people thinking they've been given a short measure and it allows the managers to keep tabs on stock. A pint of Ruby Red is £1.86. The prices are never rounded up to the 5p or 10p mark like they are down south, so you end up with a pocket full of shrapnel (or 'slag') by the end of the night.
I get my pint and walk back to the table. I'm sat between my dad and his mates.
"Son, you remember Billy and Tony don't you?"
"Yeah, course I do. How are you lads?"
"Not bad thanks son. Long time since we seen you. How are things down in London?"
"Yeah good. Work is busy so that's good, but the recession has been bad. Budgets are cut, some clients are taking the piss... but what can you do?"
"I know son... so what is it you do again?"
"I work for an advertising company. I deal with the strategy."
"So you design telly adverts?"
"Sort of. I help other people design them. I think about why we're doing stuff, and who we want to buy the stuff..."
"... and then you design the telly advert?"
"... yeah. Something like that."
"It must be a hard job, there are only so many adverts on telly."
"Yeah, true. We also do press advertising - adverts in papers, and out-of-ho... billboard ads as well."
"So you do it all then?"
"Well, sort of. The stuff you see and know as advertising, yeah. There's loads of other stuff you probably don't notice or remember... we do that as well."
"Why would you do stuff I can't remember?"
"Well, I try to do stuff you'll remember, but some channels are more effective..."
"Channel 4 and ITV, like?"
"Sorry, no, we say 'channels' but that's a term we use to talk about the different ways we can talk to a consumer. Like the paper, or a billboard, or a website - they're different channels... oh, and I meant 'talk with' the consumer, not 'talk to' - it's all about engaging people these days."
"Like a questionnaire, like?"
"Sometimes... erm... can you remember the last time you went to ASDA and there was some woman giving out free bits of cheese?"
"Aye. They were doing it last time I was there."
"Well that's called sampling. As well as trying the cheese, a good agency would have briefed the woman to talk to you in a particular way, saying particular things... hmmm, but then, thinking about it, they may not allow agency staff in there... they may only allow their staff to do the sampling..."
"Eh?"
"... anyway. Do you remember what cheese it was?"
"Cheddar."
"Which brand?"
"Brand? Haven't a clue. I think our lass bought some though because it was on offer."
"Well they're hoping that you'll eat the cheese, like it, and then see other advertising in different ways so that the brand is in the front of your mind..."
"... aye... erm... how much is it for a pint down in London then?"
"haha... depends where you go. Some places it's about £3.80 for a pi..."
"Here - did you hear that? It's £3.80 a pint in London."
"... yeah but in some places you can get a decent pint for about £2.20."
"Here - did you hear that? You can get a pint for £2.20 in London..."
"Talking of a pint - would you lads like one?"
"No thanks son, we're in our own round."
"I don't mind buying you one, it's been a while since we chatted."
"No thanks son, we'll stick to our own..."

A voice comes over the PA system when I'm walking to the bar. It's Davey the bingo caller. He checks with the other staff members in different parts of the club - upstairs and downstairs - that the PA system is working properly before they start the bingo.
    There's a 'flyer' before the turn, then the main game during the first and second spots. The flyer is a tenner for a line and £15 full house. Everyone keeps quiet while the bingo is on. As I learned when I was here as an underaged teen, you simply do not make noise when the bingo is on. It's very serious. All the women play, some of the men play. Most have their special bingo pen called a dabber, and most have 5 games on the go at once. During the game they contribute wolf whistles when number 11 is called, and some boo when it's "Brown's Den, number ten." Some of the women on my table get close to winning. They're 'sweating' on one number. Typically, just as they say that we hear a "Hold on Davey!" from the bar downstairs. Someone has won the line for a tenner. People chat amongst themselves while Davey checks the numbers. The women moan about how their luck is out recently, and the men talk about the upcoming turn: "They're good like, but the lead guitarist is a bit of a show-off. They'd be better without the leather jeans and perms, like..."
    The line is followed by a full house from someone upstairs, more moaning ensues, and the lights dim for the turn. My dad always gets a fresh pint in before the turn starts, not because he drinks a lot, but he likes to study the turn. He still plays social club gigs with his new band, but his heyday was in the 70s and 80s when he was in a band called Stage Fright. I used to watch them when I was a kid. My dad plays bass but he loves music as a whole. That's where I get my love for music from.

    There's a spurt from a smoke machine, and the turn come on stage to a backing track that says they're the best rock band playing in social clubs at the moment. The backing track ends when the keyboard player presses stop on the tape deck on his keyboard and they launch straight into 'Living on a Prayer.' Dad and me shout into each others ears some comments about the band. Some I hear and give my input, some I don't hear and simply nod.
    The turn plays a selection of classic rock songs and some new stuff. They sound better when they play Journey and Free, but they think they sound better when they play Kings of Leon and The Killers. Dad was right, they'd be better if they didn't show off so much.
    Some people get tupperware boxes out from their handbags, or from a carrier bag. They'll have pickled onions, some cubes of cheese and maybe some black pudding cut up. They'll have bought it from ASDA, or it'll be home made. On their table they'll have an informal rota to decide who brings the food in each week. They'll sit there supping a pint, munching on pickled onions watching the turn. I get jealous every week.
    At about the same time, the 'fish man' comes in. This is the same bloke that comes in every week. The first time I saw him I was 15 years old. When I was about 18 I told dad I thought he looked like Charles Bronson, so that's what we've both been calling him since. He sells tubs of prawn cocktail and ocean pinks. The big spenders go for real shellfish and opt for a crabs claw. I steer clear. There's something I don't trust about fish from a bloke delivering it in a basket to a social club.

    I go to the bar just before the first spot ends. Some bloke in the queue asks me what I think of the band.
"Not bad. They nailed "Don't Stop Believin'"
"They're shite. The singer is an arsehole..."
"... aye, there is that, like."
    I sit down with my pint to watch the last ten minutes of the first spot. When they finish, the Concert Chairman turns the lights up and talks on the PA. He asks us to show our appreciation. Most people clap politely, some clap because they really do like the band, some people start getting their bingo books out. It's fast approaching the highlight of their night. The 'main book.'
    At this point, dad asks Linda if she wants another brandy and coke before we go downstairs. Dad usually buys her two brandies for one half of coke, and she has half left so she's ok. Plus, she just wants rid of us really, so she can concentrate on her bingo.
    A mass exodus happens. Most of the men leave the room. pick up a piece of card from the bloke outside and go downstairs to the bar. It's the same every week. During the 20 minute interval, the women (and some men) play bingo, and the men all go downstairs to the bar. It's the only part of the building where the bingo audio isn't pumped into. Some people pop outside for a tab while I grab a table. It's all pretty laid back - we sit and chat about the turn.
    The speed of the drinking increases a bit when we're in the bar. We're out of vision of the women, so the men can neck a pint or two without getting evil stares. The level of swearing increases too.
    Swearing is a strange one. Everyone uses mild swear words, but no-one ever uses 'cunt.' There are a lot of 'bollocks,' 'shite' and 'shit' but people usually refrain from 'fucking' but I don't think I've ever heard anyone use the word 'cunt' in all the years I've been coming.

    We finish our second pint and head back upstairs just before the turn comes on for their second spot. No-one on our table won the bingo. It was "that bloody woman that always wins" that won. She always wins. Dad gets Linda a brandy and a coke before the second spot.
    The second spot is always about 20% good rock songs, and about 80% shite ballads to get the women up dancing. That's the strategy of the band: get the women up dancing and the men have to follow suit. It's accepted amongst the men that you have to dance to keep the women happy, so they all reach an unwritten rule not to take the piss out of each other. It needs to be done, so let's get it over with and then sit down and talk about the football.
    I stay seated, sing along to the songs I like and tap my foot along to the ones I don't but are catchy.
At 10:45 the lights flash and it's last orders. People flood to the bar. Dad stops dancing with Linda and gets a fresh pint for him and another brandy for Linda - she still has half her coke left.
One last song - usually 'I'd do anything for love (but I won't do that)' by Meatloaf and the Concert Chairman is on the PA asking us to show our appreciation. The women scream and shout for more - the brandy has well and truly kicked in - and the men edge back to their seats. Before they can get there, the band launch into 'Angels' by Robbie Williams, and the men feel obliged to dance again.
After Angels, the lights come on, the women scream for more and the men sit down. After a minute of screaming, the women amble back to the table. The lights are up now and people sit down to finish their drinks before going home.

    People approach my dad and refer to him by his school nickname 'Tatty.' They ask him how he's doing and they agree the turn were OK but would be better without the showing off.
We finish our drinks quickly - the taxi will be outside.
We step outside into the cold northern air. You can see your breath and you start shaking immediately. Of course you don't say you're cold - you take it like a man.
Dad walks up to the 3 yellow cabs that are parked up asking which is ours. The last one is. We get in - dad in the front and Linda and me in the back. My dad starts the Taxi patter immediately:
"Busy night mate?"
"No. Shite. The town's dead. No one's got any money."
"What time do you finish?"
"I was supposed to finish about 3 or 4 in the morning, but I may finish soon. There's no point carrying on if there's no-one out down town."
"Aye."
All I can think about is some food. The beer has caught up with now and I'm ready for bed.
    The taxi pulls up and my dad has the correct change ready - he's a regular Saturday night customer. We all say goodnight to the taxi driver, get out and get into the house. Dad puts the kettle on for a nice cup of tea and I raid the fridge for the pease pudding...

The beautiful immediacy of information

Herein lies a post that is stating the obvious. However, it's critical we never forget how blessed we are.

The Situation:

Trying to find a book that I read at University ten years ago so I can buy it.
Book was published in 1994 and is now out of print.
Can't remember the whole title.
Can't remember the author.

The Solution 10 or 15 years ago:

Ask friends.
Go to a library and ask.
Find out book name.
Ring and trawl around book shops like J.R. Hartley.
Possibly get a copy after much time and effort.

The Solution now:

Google part of the name.
Find the book information.
Find a very expensive hard copy.
Google the author.
Email the author.
Receive reply from author within 5 minutes.
Go to the site he tells you about.
(And, if you want to and if you get his permission, get it printed on lulu.)

The whole thing took about 15 minutes of my time. From "I can't really remember the full title" to "Mark, here's a website with the whole book downloadable for free" it took about 15 minutes.

We should never take for granted how easy, immediate and effective two tools have made the world: The power and sheer information the internet holds, and the 'needle in a haystack' effect of Google.

A good deed from Starbucks

Having studied ethicality during my MA, I learned a little bit about some not so good companies. One of these was Starbucks.  

(The only Creative Commons image of the coin I could find quickly was Japanese via dobharrison)

It's never black and white with companies this size (something we told Nike a while back) and it's very difficult for them to engage in 'good' stuff when they are so large. (It's pretty obvious really. When you get to that size and have that much influence over so many people in so many countries in so many different ways and you are making millions, then there is no 'good' or 'bad' - only 'better' and 'worse.')

Recently Starbucks have made steps to be a bit better. They've changed their coffee to Fairtrade suppliers as a standard measure whereas before you had to pay extra for this. Soya used to carry an extra charge whereas now it doesn't... if you get one of their membership cards. (I haven't looked into their shift in detail, but from a consumer point of view they're making some positive changes... regardless of why they're doing it... they have been in a bit of trouble lately...)

Anyway, so lately I've been debating the merits of whether to sign up for a Starbucks card. I don't like the fact I have to do this to get free Wi-Fi and so I don't have to pay extra for soya, but it may be worth it.

Then today when I was instore (paying with cash) I noticed that they are pledging 5p from every purchase to (RED) if you pay with the card. (Regardless of the merits of (RED) which has had a lot of criticism itself.) You can read more about it over here, but it seems pretty simple:

Every time you pay with the  (STARBUCKS)^RED Card until the 31st December 2010 we will contribute 5p to the Global Fund to help people living with AIDS in Africa.

So my mind was plotting immediately when I saw this in store this morning. I asked the barista what the cheapest thing is I could buy. Apparently it's a chocolate coin for 40p.

This means if I sign up to a (RED) card, put £10 worth of credit on it, I can buy 25 chocolate coins. As their end of the deal, if I pay for the coins separately, Starbucks will donate £1.25 to (RED). That's a 12.5% contribution of the products I've bought. (Of course it'll be more if we can find cheaper things to buy.)

Secondly, I've tried to find out of these coins are made from Fairtrade chocolate but ringing the Starbucks customer care number just now was no help - they were all busy. If it's Fairtrade, then it's another good thing.

On top of that, I'm going to donate the chocolate coins to a local charity so it's possibly 3 good deeds for the price of one.

So for £10, a local charity gets some gifts, Starbucks donate £1.25 to (RED) and I'm (possibly) supporting Fairtrade chocolate. I see that as a fair return. I rarely buy presents over Christmas, but these coins seem an OK gift to give to local charities to use as they see fit.

The key to me is if we can get a lot of people doing this. I know there's a recession on but £10 worth of coins could be useful to a lot of charities. If we get together and do this a lot, that's a lot of money and a lot of coins going toward good causes.

Advertising is War

Recently I re-watched the excellent documentary “The Fog of War” in which Robert McNamara lays out his 11 lessons of war. His lessons are based on his experiences in various conflicts: as a soldier in World War 2 and as the Secretary of Defence for the USA during both the Cuban Missile Crisis and the Vietnam War.

His lessons are explained and contextualised expertly and insightfully. So erudite is he that I set myself the challenge of explaining them in a language we’d understand…

1. Empathize with your enemy

Clients: know your competition. Understand what they’re trying to achieve and they’ll help you understand what you’re trying to achieve. Make them feel comfortable and learn about them however you can. Keep them close. Keep them very close.

2. Rationality will not save us

Planners: Understand people are not rational beings. Advertising is not a science. We’re emotional beings, so be emotional and have an opinion. Trust your hunch. Learn from rational facts but rely on your emotions. Computers rely on rational facts and when they get it wrong you need a good survival strategy…

3. There's something beyond one's self

Account Teams: As well as wanting an agency to over-deliver on their professional requirements, clients want an agency to push them beyond their personal boundaries too. They want to learn, to be a bit uncomfortable and to push their brand further than before. When you get the butterflies in the stomach, when you have to make sacrifices – that’s when you’re pushing yourself. Push the limits of yourself and of the brand and don’t dishonour yourself or your colleagues in the process...

4. Maximize efficiency

Agencies: Make sure the ROI is the best it can possibly be. Work on things in the right way, with the right principles and with agreed objectives. For us here, it’s about seamless integration: Together is Better. We do everything under one roof and this helps us achieve the targets that can otherwise seem insurmountable. From one building we can fight our battles together, as a team, inch by inch...

5. Proportionality should be a guideline in war

Clients: Understand the balance of what goes in and be realistic with what you expect out. Diverting the budget to a less costly channel may not give you the results you want. Moreover, think beyond the channel and think about whether that small battle is the right battle. Just because other brands are diverting some of their spend to Social Media doesn’t mean you should. Choose your battles carefully as there are some you just can’t win...

6. Get the data

Planners: Read that again. It says ‘Get the data’ – it doesn’t say ‘Rely on the data.’ Data is only as good as the people interrogating it. It plays a vital part in effective communications and is a great tool to validate thinking. But remember people are emotional beings and numbers aren’t emotional. If the numbers aren’t going your way, emotion can play a big part…

7. Belief and seeing are often both wrong

Planners: There is a balance between trusting your Account Teams and your Creatives, but you’re the impartial person in the equation. Question the belief the Account Team has with the client and their brief and question how the Creatives see the answer in their head. You’re in between two warring factions a lot of the time, and it’s your job to prevent meltdown...

8. Be prepared to re-examine your reasoning

Planners: Question everything, all the time. When you’re happy with the reasons you’ve arrived at, go for a cup of tea and question them again. Only by thorough interrogation can a solution be truly robust. Above all, believe in what you’re proposing. If the numbers support your solution but your instinct doesn’t then think of another solution. Never go over the top without knowing it’s the right thing to do… it may be the last thing you do…

9. In order to do good, you may have to engage in evil

Everyone: It’s a dog-eat-dog world out there. On both sides of the equation there are a lot of careers being traveled and a lot of egos being serviced. At some point you’re going to have to do stuff with people you don’t like. It’s a part of life. If you’re both agreed on the end goal a bit of evil is worth the hassle. However, share your views without considering the consequences and you run the risk of upsetting people…

10. Never say never

Pitch Teams: Don’t rule anything out. No matter how well you’ve prepared, how deep you’ve researched, how well you know the sector, you simply don’t know the full picture. Always be wary of the question you don’t think they’ll ask. Always look at it from the angle you don’t think makes sense. There are unknowns in everything when it comes to war…

11. You can't change human nature

Planners: Don’t try and be like other Planners. Be your own Planner and be happy knowing you can’t win them all. Some you’re destined to win regardless of the strategy and some you’re destined to lose regardless of the strategy. Make sure you’re happy with the strategy and don’t change it at the last minute. Last minute plans rarely have time to work...

A confusing conversation

So I've booked some flights on British Airways over the Christmas period. I'm excited to be honest.

I booked with BA instead of the alternatives because of their customer care and because I'm a member of their Executive Club which means I can get some reciprocal benefits the more I fly. It means it's worth spending a little extra to fly with them sometimes.

Since then I've been getting a little worried about the press coverage saying that BA staff may strike over the Christmas period. It's all up in the air at the moment - pardon the pun.

As you'd expect I'm a bit edgy. I've paid a lot of money for these flights and I don't want to book accommodation until it's sorted. It's times like these you want clear communication with the brand to try and figure out what the state of play is.

 

That didn't work. No reply. So I tried again a day later:

 

... and again:

 

(Although I do admit they may not have picked that one up due to the typo.) After that, I started getting little annoyed.

They were still pumping out their sales tweets but not listening to someone who had just paid them hundreds of pounds up front for a service that may not happen.

 

I got a bit annoyed by this tweet so unfortunately my otherwise utterly professional manner slipped somewhat...

 

All I was trying to do was to speak to the brand that had entered into a contract with me. I had paid a lot of money up front for a service that was now being threatened.

After that tweet I was finally contacted via DM and within a couple of hours I had an email waiting for me.

 
(I particularly love the "Get the best from British Airways..." at the bottom. All I want to know is if I'm getting what I've already paid for.)

There are many lessons here. Firstly, I do not understand a word of that email. Do you? Is that last line of the paragraph a nice way of saying "If the flight is canceled you're buggered, but if you look in the small print of your ticket it says that right there."

What is most annoying is that since all of this started, I have had numerous 3rd party emails via British Airways and other associated sales emails from them. A search for British Airways brings up:

So, BA, I have one very simple question for you: What makes you think I would invest any time or money into your brand when you can't even tell me if the time and money I've already invested will amount to anything?

Beyond another post commenting on how to use Twitter, I think the learning from this is simple.

If you lose your core offering you have no right trying to sell some of your associated products. The reason you could sell those associated products was because of the trust you'd built up because of your core offering. When that core offering ceases, you can't trade on that equity any more.

Branding landmarks

Usually, being a fan of Newcastle United doesn't cross over into my profession of working in Advertising. Sure I'll have opinions on how badly the club handle the press and how they have no concept of how to generate positive PR, but on a day to day professional basis there's no overlap.

That was until I read the news that Mike Ashley is listening to offers from brands to rename the stadium. From a personal perspective it appals me. From a brand point of view I also think it's potentially a really bad move. Let me explain...

St James' Park is the oldest football stadium in the North East. It's one of the few stadiums left in the country that has a city centre location. When you travel into Newcastle from the South (as the majority of our opponents do) you get the amazing sight of the stadium looking down over the city. It's a beautiful sight and one I still look forward to even after seeing it hundreds of times. Within the city it's a key focal point. On match day it's the centre of the universe. When you're not in the ground and Newcastle score you can here it in the city centre. It's a true multi-sensory experience that goes beyond its boundaries.

When I've spoken to opposition fans they've been unequivocal about their love of the ground. They can get off the train, walk through the city, and get up to the ground via several drinking holes. It's not located in a trading estate situated out of town like other stadia. (Of course it's not all romantic - some fans clash and some pubs are better than others.)

So with that in mind. With all of those positives I've listed above in mind, which brand do I think should name the ground?

Well, I think who it is is much less important than how they do it.

You see, St James' Park is old. It has heritage. People know it as St James' Park. It's not like other grounds that are known as a few different names (West Ham for example is known by some as Upton Park, and some as the Boleyn Ground) and it's never had a different name in the 117 years since Newcastle United was formed.

(Some other grounds have branded names but by and large these names were given when a new stadium was built.)

The simple fact is, St James' Park is a name that people have heard, talked about, trusted (despite ownership) and had deep emotional connections to for the whole of their lives. A brand is going to have to do something very special indeed to make sure they build on this and at the same time not destroy any positive consumer feelings toward their brand.

So what would I say if I were advising a brand on this issue?

Two very simple things:

Firstly, I wouldn't change the name. It's as simple as that. Do not call it 'The [Brand] Stadium.' It'll do you more harm than good. Newcastle United fans (many of whom are global by the way) will simply resent your brand. They'll still call it St James' Park and they'll resent your brand. Opposition fans have also always called it St James' Park so the chances of them calling it anything different is slim. They've had a constant message of "St James' Park" all of their lives, so how long will you have to buy the sponsorship to change even a small percentage? A long, long time. Not a good ROI.

Secondly, I'd communicate with the fans and ask them what they want out of it. It may be a privately owned business, but it'd disappear tomorrow if the fans stopped watching. This is a key learning the brand can take from the people they'll buy the rights from: the Ashley regime. If you study how they have conducted themselves since buying the club, simply do the opposite. They are shockingly bad at communicating with the fans. You need to be much, much better. Ask them what they would be comfortable with. Test ideas with them. Speak to them as people, not as nameless animals. If you do this they'll respect your business as a brand, but they'll also build up a trust with the people behind the brand.

Own the rights to name it, let everyone know you own those rights (subtly in some cases) but respect the name and don't change it.

It will be a brave brand that does the above, but it'll be a respected brand. It'll be a brand that will be supported by the fans instead of being disowned by them. It'll be a brand that goes up in my estimations, my friends estimations and my family's estimations. I'd guess that other fans may feel the same as me too. It'll be a positive action. Not a negative action.

So, pass this on to the brands thinking about it, and comment below. Let's help them do it the right way, and let's get chatting to them.

Mark
madesignstudies@gmail.com

My take on the Product Placement issue

I've just drafted a very brief response to Haymarket about the Product Placement issue that's kicking around at the moment. It's intentionally short, but I wanted to save my initial thoughts for posterity. It's going to be interesting to see how things pan out.

Will brands pay for products in Corrie rather than a TV ad spot? No.
Will some pay for products in Corrie as well as their usual TV ad spot? Yes.

Product placement is a channel like any other, and like any other the key to successfully marketing a product using that channel is relevancy. If it is relevant for a brand to be placed in a suitable TV programme, then a good agency will do that. If it’s not relevant, then they shouldn’t.

As with the recent glut of brands wanting “a social media campaign” we can be sure that some brands will now approach their agencies and want their products placed in TV programmes. This is the point that will sort the wheat from the chaff.

If it’s relevant, a good agency will do it. Less good agencies will place their clients brands without strategic thinking and we’ll end up in a similar situation to the social media world: irrelevant, ill-conceived campaigns that make it difficult to see the strategically relevant campaigns that truly add value to a brand.

The intricacies of this channel will play a vital part of the success of campaigns. Will brands have control over how the placement works? What about how overt the placement is? Will there be a number of agency representatives when Corrie is filmed and will they have a say in how a specific scene is shot? And what of the psychological and moral implications of promoting a brand in this way? Will it only be Corrie, or will factual programmes be used too?

These issues will be ironed out as the channel matures, but they’ll be ironed out in public, with an expectant audience.

When Twitter can be better than advertising

I've just had one of those things happen to me that put a smile on my face. One of those things that puts you in a slightly better mood. One of those things that not only gives you the satisfaction of money well spent, but makes a bit of a personal difference to you.

Money Supermarket were, up until a few hours ago, just another financial comparison site for me.

Realising I needed to change an address on a policy, I tried to call them on Monday. An answering machine said that I can't do stuff like that over the phone. Putting the phone down frustrated, I tweeted this message and thought nothing of it.

Then, out of the blue, I received these two messages earlier today.

I emailed Ian, got a reply within 90 seconds and when I was replying to his email I had a phone call from Money Supermarket. Within a few minutes my issues had been resolved completely. (Why they could deal with the issue over the phone after I had tweeted about it, when they couldn't prior to the tweet, is a moot point...)

What's important to me in this instance is something I often say to colleagues and clients: Every experience with a brand is its advertising.

In this instance, it literally is. 

I cannot remember a single piece of advertising for Money Supermarket. I have no idea what their strapline is, no idea of their colourways or even their logo. I have no idea of their tone of voice, what their latest deal is and to be honest I don't even know their URL - I would just google 'travel insurance.'

But, what I do know about Money Supermarket is that they have been proactive in looking after one of their (very minor) customers. They responded very quickly and efficiently to my query. More importantly for me is that I can now put a name to them. They're not a brand. A person there spoke to me as a person. They care about my custom.

I've not taken any of that from their current advertising. For the link to their site in the paragraph up there I've just looked at their homepage. They're saying stuff that isn't as important to me as the things I've just learned about them. The experience I've just had is better than their advertising.

All of this for a £26 Annual Travel Insurance premium. I've not needed to use it yet and hopefully won't need to use it at all until it expires, but so far it's worth every single penny, and it will be next year when I renew with them.

Usually, people will stop using a brand if that brand doesn't live up to its side of the bargain. In a recession though, people will stop using a brand without any negative reason if there is an alternative elsewhere. It's this reason that brands need to constantly add value for their customers. Even if there's nothing 'wrong' in the relationship.

Optimising work time

I've been thinking about how to get the most out of my work time lately.

Things are so busy here at the moment that the only time I really get to think about this is when I'm running. (Being busy is great - we're working on some really good work for our clients and also lots of lovely new business things are around so it's lovely to have lots of things to test me and to learn from.)

(Also, I still haven't figured out the best way to track my thoughts when running - I can't carry a Moleskine and a dictaphone just ends up with lots of wheezing on it. I think of so many things when I'm running, by the time I get back I've forgotten them all...)

Anyway - I hastily sketched this out when thinking about getting the most from my work time:

It's meant to show the 'Workflow/ Pontification Balance' for me. Or for how I think it should happen for Planners, if I were to stick my neck out.

You see, in a sentence, I think Planners should be thought of more as a Creative Team, and less so an Account Team.

In order to spit good things out, you need to soak good things up. And lots of soaking up is needed to spit out a small amount of relevant stuff. (The key word there for me is 'relevant' - spitting out lots of stuff is kinda easy, but spitting out the right stuff is what sorts the wheat from the chaff in my mind.)

Of course during a recession, timescales change, plans change, and watching YouTube for inspiration doesn't really go down too well with the people at the top of the tree unless it's chargeable time. But for me, we need to remember the longer term plan when we look at things like this. It's easy to chain people to the desk and whip them 9 hours a day, but I reckon the output would suffer.

It's second nature for me to be interested in everything. When I'm not sat at the desk I'm thinking about the same stuff anyway. I could be running, in the boozer with a friend or at a talk and ideas can pop into my head. Whether I'm sat at my desk or in these other places, the natural reaction is always "I wonder if that's useful to the stuff I'm working on?"

The trick in trying to sell the above model into the people that matter, though, is to try and make them understand that the 'soaking up' part of the model is just as important as the 'spitting out' part of the model. They're integral to each other:

• Expect me to spit stuff out all the time without soaking stuff up, and I'll get predictable;
• Allow me to soak stuff up for too long without a good opportunity to spit it out and I'll burst.

I'm happy that I'm very motivated and very much a self-starter. I'm pro-active and don't wait around for people to instruct me so I'm pretty good at finding the balance. What also helps me is that if I'm spitting stuff out a bit too much at work, then I soak stuff up in my free time. If I get the chance to soak stuff up when I'm at work, then it's good to spit it out in other ways at home - that's when this blog or other side interests come in handy.

Having this time outside of work is integral to me, and if I didn't live and breathe advertising it wouldn't be possible to do this. I guess it's another part of the Planning mix: living it, breathing it.

A new agency, a new desk

So, big changes since the last update from "The place where the magic happens..."

I'm no longer at Woo, and no longer in Engine Towers. I spent a few months soaking up what life had to offer and now I'm at a shiny new desk with a shiny new mac whirring away with all things planning. I'll post more about the new agency and the new role when the time is right, but for now behold the place where the magic happens:

We've got all the signs of some serious planning happening at this desk. Cold coffee, ever-present water to prevent headaches, new business cards already being given out and an iPod that you'd love to get the chance to listen to but can't. Add in not one, but two office 'To-Do' pads (and a moleskine in the bag under the desk), too many files saved to the desktop and the ubiquitous fork on the desk from too many lunches al-desco.

The cigars aren't mine - they're for a friend - but I've been tempted to light one up and chill out over the past two months.

Two months in. Exciting stuff to work on, some great work being produced. Bring it on.